Tips for New Baby Doms/Dommes - great things to say and do!

Dirty Talk, For Doms, Starting Out -

Tips for New Baby Doms/Dommes - great things to say and do!

There are some things a Dominant can say that just sends their submissives legs to jelly with quivery anticipation and lust!

These are some ideas for what you say and how you play to really get in the Dominant headspace and into the power play dynamic and really reinforce that you are the Dominant and they are your submissive. This list has been written for a male Dominant with a female submissive. But if your gender differs and you have a male submissive, please read it as “he”.

  1. Tie your submissive’s wrists behind their back and force her to suck you off. Or tie her spread eagled to the bed and tease her (you could also incorporate forced orgasms or orgasm denial)
  2. Include a blindfold in play to make her feel helpless and vulnerable: “I’m going to tease you until you beg me to let you cum/for my cock”, “I love having you all tied up so can do whatever I want to that (insert description eg. sexy, perfect, hot, tight) little body of yours”
  3. Leave her tied up so she can just see you and increase sexual tension and anticipation by masturbating and telling her you are just going to enjo the view. Or alternative masturbating and rub your cock over different parts of her body. 

SAFETY TIP: Never leave them tied up and alone, make sure you have safewords and have safety equipment nearby for quick release of bondage if you need to!

  1. Write on her body eg. Slut, whore, bitch, pet, slave, cumslut, or even sentences like “I’m a cock-loving dirty little slut”, “Property of my Master”, “Master’s fucktoy”
  2. Have her masturbate while you watch or pick out a toy for her to use on herself while you watch: “I want to watch you play with/touch yourself.” “I want you to make yourself cum.” “Fuck yourself with this [give her whatever sex toy you’ve chosen]. Don’t stop until you’ve cum.”
  3. Dirty talk ideas!
    1. Short commands (or add “I want you to …” in front of them). “Come here”, “Stand there”, “Suck me”, “Get on your knees”, “Spread your ass”, “Beg for my cock”, “I want you wet for me”, “On your knees now. Face down, ass up”, “Touch yourself”, “NOW” at the end of the commands in a stern voice
    2. Create a sense of possession and ownership: “Your body/ass/pussy belongs to me. Do you understand?”, “You’re mine to play with and do whatever I want with”. Or just “Mine” or “You’re mine” - because submissives LOVE to feel owned
    3. Erotic verbal humiliation or degradation (subject to limits and boundaries you have negotiated) and watch them closely to make sure they aren’t reacting negatively:
      1. Call her a “dirty/filthy/naughty little slut/whore/cunt/bitch/cumslut/sex toy.” “The only thing you’re good for is to be fucked/satisfying/serving me.”
      2. Make her degrade herself: “What are you?” [Her: “Your little slut/whore/cunt/bitch/cumslut”] “What are you good for?” [Her: To be fucked/used/satisfying you”] “You’re my dirty/filthy/naughty little slut/whore/cunt/bitch/cumslut/sex toy. Say it/Repeat it.” If she hesitates, punish her with a slap/spank/pinch. “Not fast/quick enough. Let’s try again. (Repeat the question/your demand).” If her response is satisfactory, “Good girl/slut/whore/cunt/bitch/cumslut” Or “That’s better.” If you are not satisfied with her response, punish her until she gets it right.
      3. Punish her every time she forgets to call you Sir or Master
    4. Praise/compliments - a great alternative to degradation or mix it up with the degrading names!
      1. Positive terms like “Good girl/pet/slave” or “Sweetheart”, “Angel”, “Baby girl”, “Little one.”
      2. You can “soften” “degrading” terms by adding a positive adjective – i.e. “What a sweet/good/beautiful/sexy/perfect/lovely/pretty little slut/whore you are.”
      3. Praise her for satisfying you so well or how pleased you are with her behaviour or how well she’s pleased you: “What a good cock-sucking slave you are.” “You’ve satisfied/pleased me/your master very much.” “You’re such a good obedient little slave/girl/pet.” Or for taking her punishment so well: “You’re such a good girl for taking your punishment so well."

For female Dommes, with male or female submissives, you can also use the list above but just adapt it depending on whether you have a strap on for a cock or not! You can use all the ideas though, just customised to your circumstances. If you have a male submissive, here are some other dirty talk power play ideas you can use:

  1. ”Awww. Baby, does that feel good? Yes it does. I know you like it.”
  2. ”Good boy. Just stay like that. Be a good boy for me.”
  3. ”You’re such a good boy.”
  4. ”You’re penis feels really good when you lie there like that. Just let me cum on it. Stay just like that.”

For humiliation ideas for your male submissive (thanks to Bobo Long, a Female-Led Relationship Educator):

  1. Start with CFNM (Clothed Female Naked Male). A sub must be naked at all times in private. Dommes wear clothes because 1) that's what civilized people do, 2) the sub has no business ever seeing her unclothed body.
  2. Shave his whole body. That's right. Everything. Maybe let him keep his eyebrows. At a minimum, his pubes need to be shaved. No sub is allowed to have pubic hair.
  3. Now give him some accessories. A chastity cage is a must. It controls his orgasms and lets everyone know he a pathetic beta who isn't even allowed to get hard.
  4. Add a butt plug so he can constantly feel his filled up "man pussy." And, of course, he will have his slave collar and matching wrist and ankle cuffs to complete his attire.
  5. A sub must be given an embarrassing name. A dog name like Fido is good. Or make up an embarrassing name, such as Latrina. If you can't think of anything, just refer to him as Slut or Worm Boy.
  6. Give him a steady diet of degradation. Call him a "stupid bitch," make fun of his small joke of a penis that can never satisfy any women, reinforce that he's a loser beta and that only your pleasure matters.
  7. Make him ask for permission to do anything and don’t grant permission easily. Make him BEG.
  8. Give him eye-contact restrictions. He is never to make eye-contact with you without permission. Also give strict speech restrictions and when he is allowed to speak, make sure he use honorifics, i.e. Mistress, Domina, Goddess, etc. If he speaks out of turn, gag him.
  9. Be sure to give him a weekly maintenance caning so his butt remains beet red with fresh, new welts.
  10. The sub must eat his meals from a dog bowl or directly off the floor, and then wash it down with his Mistress's golden nectar.
  11. A sub is not allowed to use furniture, however, sometimes he can be furniture. Subs make nice footstools. If you're a smoker, use his mouth as an ashtray. Also spit into his mouth regularly.
  12. Mark him as yours. Force him to get a tattoo saying "Property of Mistress ______." Make him get a P.A. piercing and nipple piercings. Brand him with your initials.

There are many things you can say and do in your D/s dynamic to accentuate the power play and make your submissive turned on, owned, adored and humiliated, or all of them all at once! These are just some ideas. Don’t forget to stick within limits, have safewords and remember that every sub is different - what works for one in this list may have a complete opposite effect on another!

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